Goodbye


Goodbye!
It is difficult to say goodbye to someone or something you love. It is a strain on the feelings and to those of us who feel and allow emotions to flow freely, there is a certain sad sweetness when we say goodbye. What is referred to here is when we say goodbye permanently or semi-permanently; that is when we do not expect to see the person soon or perhaps ever again. When we grow to love someone we form wholeness with that person; when we say goodbye, that wholeness is broken and it is as if a part of us is wrenched away.


The hardest situation in which to say goodbye is when we are bidding farewell to a loved one who has gone from this world. Wakes and funeral rites were probably formulated so that we can make this goodbye emotionally tolerable. A great deal of holiness is thrown over the related rituals, which appear to be formulated in order to honor the departed one and to ensure his or her place in the next world. Putting aside such beliefs, we see that the rituals were probably created so that we can console ourselves when we say goodbye. Alas, the consolation is probably short-lived. When the rituals are in process and the goodbyes are said in all seriousness, those of us involved manage to hold back the tide of sadness and tears. These burst out usually when the rituals are over and stark reality- that we will never see our beloved again- thrusts itself on us. Such goodbyes are heart wrenching indeed.


Breaking up with someone who has been a beloved over a period of time is another sad goodbye. Some of us are “old-fashioned” enough to put in our all into a relationship. It is really devastating when we realize that the other party to the relationship has been frivolous about it and has been restraining him or herself. It is even more devastating when the relationship has been strong on both sides and when we have to break up because of circumstances; as in the case when one party leaves the country for good because his or her parents decide to emigrate. Often in such cases, there is a possibility that the goodbye marks the end of a stage of life and the beginning of another. Also, we may often see the person we are saying goodbye to again. However, the situation is not the same. For example, when a close friend or neighbor leaves for another neighborhood, it is possible to continue seeing the neighbor, but it is the same thing? Can we still be as close? Can we exchange food? Can we smell the cooking of each other? The answer is “Certainly not without special effort.” The goodbye here is to a person as well as to a certain lovable situation.


It is true that goodbyes are just another way of saying “see you again soon”. Naturally, in such cases goodbyes are nothing to fuss about. But “real” goodbyes are painful if not devastating. Yet there is sweetness about it all that we cannot explain.              

Modes of Payment


 Modes of Payment


Payments through the Internet

Online payment: It is done through internet banking system which can do electronically throughout the whole world with the help of internet connection. Virtual shopping company like Amazon.com or ebay.com accept mostly Visa card or MasterCard for their online payment but most virtual assistant service like paid to click (PTC) sites pay through the following renowned online banking system: 
  • Payza
  • Paypal
  • Liberty Reserve


Payments through the Bank

Cheques: They are used for payments which are large in amount and payments within the country. They are convenient and safe means of payment, especially for large amounts. They also serve as records of payments. Cheques that are crossed have to be paid into an account. This safeguards payments by cheque.

Cashier's order:  It is a bank's own cheque drawn upon itself which can be purchased at the bank. It is used when a creditor is unwilling to accept a personal cheque or when the one making the payment does not have a current account. It is a convenient and safe means of payment as the drawer of the cheque is a bank. It can be used for payments of any amount within the same town.

Bank draft: It is a cheque drawn by one bank on another bank, demanding that the latter pay a specified sum to the payee named on the draft. The advantages of using the bank draft to remit money are the same as those of a cashier's order.  It can be used to remit money to other towns in the same country or even abroad.
 
Standing order: It is an order to a bank to make regular payments of a fixed amount on one's behalf from one's current account, e.g. for rental, insurance premiums and hire-purchase installments. It is a convenient and safe means of making payments promptly.

Credit transfer: It is payment made directly into the bank account of the payee upon instructions from an account holder. It is convenient and safe. It is usually used for making payments into many accounts from one account, e.g. payment of salaries to staff members of a large company. It is an economical or relatively cheap means of making payments as only one cheque is required for multiple payments.

Direct debiting: It is similar to standing orders except that the amount to be paid and the date of payment are not fixed.  Upon receipt of a debit form, the bank is authorized to debit the account of the debtor and transfer the cash to the account of the creditor shown in the form.

Bank giro: It is a system of payment which allows for monetary transfers between account holders. It is similar to a credit transfer system.

Mail and telegraphic transfer: They are remittances that can be made through the bank. Both are convenient means of payment because the bank informs the payee of the remittance on the remitter's behalf. In the case of mail transfer, the payment instruction is remitted by mail while in the case of telegraphic transfer; the payment instruction is made via cable or telex. The latter is for urgent remittance. All local remittances are payable in local currencies while foreign remittances are payable in foreign currencies drawn on an overseas bank.

Credit card : Holders of a credit card can charge their expenses to the card and pay for them when they receive the statement of account from the credit card centre. This type of payment is popular because the card holder can defer payment for the goods he has purchased. However, credit cards are only accepted at certain local and overseas establishments and there is usually a credit limit granted to the card holder.

Autophone or telebanking or mobile-banking:  It is a service through which customers can pay bills (e.g. utility bills) or make loan repayments, hire purchase installments, credit card payments, club subscriptions through the use of their telephones. Autophone or telebanking operates 24 hours a day via the push-button telephone linked to the bank's computer centre.

Traveller's cheques: They are common means of payment in overseas travels. They are a form of international cheques issued by certain international banks and specialized companies. They can be issued in various currencies like US dollars, Sterling Pounds, Japanese Yen, Swiss Francs, Deutsche marks, Australian dollars, Hong Kong dollars and Singapore dollars. They are issued in various denominations and can be purchased from any bank. They can be cashed at banks or used for payments in. hotels, shops, restaurants and established outlets. They are safer than currency notes because if they are lost, they can he refunded. They can be used for an indefinite period or they can be resold to the bank when one returns from one's travels.

Bills of exchange: They are commonly used as means of securing payment in foreign trade.


Payments through the Post Office

Postage stamps: They can be used for small payments. Instead of sending cash by mail for small payments, one can send unused postage stamps which can be cashed at any post office.

International reply coupon: It is a means of repayment of replies by post. These coupons (selling price $2.50 each) may be exchanged in any country of the Universal Postal Union for a stamp or stamps representing the minimum postage prepayable on an unregistered letter to any country by air mail.

Postal order: It is a convenient, safe and cheap means of sending money through the postal services. Amounts to be remitted should not exceed $100. It can be used to make payments for direct mail orders of small amounts. A small commission is charged for the use of postal orders, the rate varying with the denomination of the postal order. Stamps are used to make up odd amounts. The nature of the payee and the office for payment must be filled in by the remitter so that the postal order will not fall into wrong hands.

Money order:  It is a cheap, convenient and safe way of remitting money via the post office. The maximum remittance amount is $2000 and the commission charged is $2. However, overseas money order is subject to the limit set by the country of destination.

Telegraphic money order: It is a facility offered for urgent and speedy remittance of money using the postal telegraphic service. The charges are higher than for ordinary money order.

Giro system: It provides cheap and convenient banking facilities to those who open giro accounts at the post office. It operates like the current account system of a bank. Giro account holders can make payments using giro cheques. Credit transfer and standing order facilities like payment of HDB rental or conservancy charges, housing loans are provided to account holders. Unlike the current account system, the giro system does not grant overdraft facilities and there are limits on personal cash withdrawals. Giro cheques can be used for payments to a giro account holder or a non-giro account holder. In both cases, the cheques have to be sent to the Giro Centre for verification of the drawer's account before any payment is made. In the case of the former, the payee will be advised by the Centre if the account is to be credited. If the payee is a non-giro account holder, he will be sent the giro cheque once it has been verified and he can cash it at any post office or bank it into his bank account. Giro service charges aro relatively cheap.

Postal automated machines (PAM): These have been set up in various sites in Singapore. They use multi-media touch screen technology that allows people to interact with it. The following can be made via PAM:

(a) Payment of bills — power supply and Singapore Telecom.

(b) Payment of parking fees -- Housing Development Board (HDB) and Urban Redevelopment Authority  (URA).

c) Purchase of products -- stamp booklets, prepaid envelopes, prospect envelopes, postcards, aerograrnmes and phone cards. Payment can be made by NETS (Network or Electronic Transfer Singapore Ltd) using an ATM (Automated Teller Machine) card.


Payments in Cash

Currency notes and coins: Currency notes which legal tender to an unlimited amount are, i.e. they cannot lawfully be refused by creditors as payments for debts. Currency coins which are legal tender up to a limited amount: in Singapore and Malaysia Bangladesh, BDT 1 coins are legal tender up to BDT 5. Cash is used when payments are small in amount; payments are made directly, for purchase of goods or services, e.g. buying stationery from a local shop or paying the bus fare. It is used as a common means of payment because it is convenient and generally acceptable, being legal tender.

Factors to Choose Mode of Payment

Above shows a list of the various means of payment which can be used in trade and commerce and below shows the mode of payment normally adopted depends on the following factors:

Amount:  If the amount is small, cash is usually used. If the amount is large, it is more convenient to pay by cheque or bank draft. Payment by money or postal order is limited to a certain amount.

Distance:  If payment is made directly or personally, cash may be used. If the payment has to be posted to another part of the country, it is safer and more convenient to remit money through the bank by way of cheque or bank draft or through the post office via money or postal order. For payment overseas, it is best to go through the bank via purchase of bank draft, mail transfer or telegraphic transfer. Cheques cannot be used for payment abroad as their use is restricted to payment within the country. Payment overseas through the postal service may not be possible if there is no postal arrangement with the overseas country concerned.

Safety: It is always more risky to pay by cash than by cheque especially when the amount is large. If the payment is paid by cheque and the cheque is lost, payment can be stopped. When it is necessary to ensure payment, the payee can insist that payment be made by banker's cheque or bank draft rather than personal cheque. This is because there is no risk of the former being returned due to insufficient funds. For the same reason, a retail outlet may find payment by credit card safer than payment by personal cheque.

Urgency:  If cash is to be remitted urgently, the fastest means would be by telegraphic transfer either through the bank or post office.

Cost: Cheque is the cheapest means of payment as the cost of each cheque is only 15 cents. The cost of a bank draft is higher and varies with the amount to be remitted. Money order may be cheaper for small remittance; however, it is no longer economical if the remittance exceeds a certain amount.

Due date:  When the payment is supposed to be effected or due is an important consideration. Cheques and bank drafts are payable on demand whereas bills of exchange may be drawn, payable at sight, on demand or at a fixed or determinable future date. However, the beneficiary of a bill of exchange that is due for payment at some future date may get immediate payment by discounting (i.e. sell less interest) the bill with a bank. Payment by credit card is delayed until the holder receives the statement of account from the Credit Card Centre. Even then, he does not need to settle the whole amount. He is only required to pay a minimum sum. The outstanding balance is the amount of credit taken and he is charged interest on this amount.


Reference:

Betsy, L., & Tan, K. S. (1999). Transport., Modern certificate guide: Elements of Commerce
                    (pp. 90-96). Singapore: Oxford University Press

Generation Gap


Generation Gap

There is always a tendency to compare our present lifestyle to that of many years ago. To a certain extent, things were much better in earlier times. Firstly, in the aspect of education, students faced less pressure from teachers and parents. Expectations of these people were often-realistic and achievable and this helped them to be relaxed and cool as individuals. Today, students are much pressurized to perform well in school to meet the expectations of their teachers and parents. This is reflected by the numerous tuition sessions and supplementary lessons they have to attend and more often than not, the academic aspect overrides the importance of social and emotional development.

Community living in Kampongs was more attractive and successful in the past; people were drawn together naturally despite their different religion or race. They were spontaneous in greeting or helping one another. Today, people are suspicious of their neighbors and it is common to see closed doors in most high-rise flats. There is often little or no communication among neighbors in some cases. The purchasing power of the consumer is higher in the past. With a relatively low standard of living, consumer goods were unsophisticated and cheap, with merely twenty cents, one could buy a bowl of red bean soup! Today, a consumer needs to posses more money to purchase basic necessities of life. Of course, the present time has its appeal too.


The impressive advance in technology, our life is made more comfortable. The computer system enables one to edit a completed work repeatedly and serves various functions as well. Information can be saved in files and easily retrieved if desired. Even the computers of today are more portable and compact in their designs. A laptop or notebook can be carried around easily! The telecommunication services are so advanced that there is greater accessibility to make international calls whenever we like. There is no need to travel overseas to make personal visits when important messages need to be conveyed. Isn't this a fantastic breakthrough? Another important positive trait of today's society is the improvement in public transport. With the invention of MRTs, road congestion, noise and air pollution are reduced. With the present increasing focus on environmental issues, this is an essential step taken by us. Thus, the lifestyle and society of today and that in the past have their own positive and negative traits. It is important for one to remain objective to see and appreciate the strengths of both limes.

The group of people targeted in this topic is the young people. The word "young" refers to older teenagers and young adult. It is definitely wrong to assume that these people share the same convictions in their behavior, appearances and work, considering their different personality make up and the environment in which they grow up. These two factors strongly influence the way they set standards for themselves.



In the aspect of behavior, I would strongly disagree that many youths today possess high standards. As a result of a fast-changing and permissive society, many young people have succumbed to the pressures and moral challenges posed by the mass media and peer pressure. I It is sad to note a decline in the moral standard among the young ones and this is seen in the increased number of youths who smoke and drink unashamedly in public, frequent restricted places by lying about their age and are even caught with unwanted pregnancies due to premarital sex. This could be attributed to the fact that it is during this period of their lives that they are undergoing emotional changes and are seeking for peer identification. Consequently, they are rebellious to authority and are less stable emotionally to defect and arrest certain negative influences that come along their way. There are of course 4 numbers of youths who posses’ strong moral standards due to good home environments and other external influences but they are, in my opinion, fast becoming “extinct”.

With regard to appearances, young people are undoubtedly serious in creating and maintaining high standards. They take pride in dressing smartly, keeping abreast with the latest fashion. Although it costs more to maintain such lifestyles, young people are not hesitant in investing in trendy clothes and costume jewelry, visiting famous hairstylists and carrying branded handbags, briefcases and other items. However, the nature of their jobs does dictate the extent to which young people dress up. Those who work in offices in town areas have the tendency to be more particular about dressing. This is perfectly called for as long as they are neither too pompous nor suggestive in their dressing. As for those who travel often to do administrative work or delivery services, they cannot afford to be too particular in their dressing. Some may even end up in T-shirts and jeans when reporting for work.

Concerning the standards of work, I would refer more to the attitudes shown among young people. While there is a group of people who exhibit a spirit of excellence in their work, they are also others who perpetually hand in shoddy work. The former group would be diligent and positive in learning new things while the latter would be the last to complete assignments and yet the first to complain when new knowledge is to be taught. It is definitely those who are positive and receptive those do not fail to impress their employers. As to those who have poor and low standards, they would gladly job-hop, having little sense, of perseverance or be dismissed if the traits of laziness or unprofessional become too overwhelming. It is important for young and old people alike to reach for high standards in their behavior, appearance and work. Having attained it, it is crucial that they strive to maintain these standards. This certainly cannot be achieved early but the effort throughout this noble quest and the eventual attainment is undoubtedly highly admirable.

Is there an ideal response of young people towards those older than themselves? Should they always respect and obey them in all circumstances? In my opinion, respect and obedience do not always go hand in hand all the time. In my context, people who are older than me would be my parents, older siblings, teachers, relatives and others. Suppose if these people started life on this earth earlier than me their experiences built up over the years would exceed mine. They have seen the coming and going of generations, the implementation and abolition of policies and even the construction and demolition of various infrastructures in our country. In view of their seniority in age and experiences, they do deserve our respect. This, I believe, is unquestionable.


Respecting our seniors is the basic expression of politeness. We respect them by many ways such as greeting them, helping them to do anything that is within our capacity and seeking counsel from them in making decisions in life. In so doing, we are reflecting a receptive and humble attitude to acknowledge their seniority. Such response from us is seen as an expression of love too. Purchasing gifts for people older than us is not the only means to express our love. Showing consistent respect to them is a more effective and convincing way to do so. Being assured of our sincerity, they will be most happy and contented.

However, should young people always obey those older than themselves? I do not think so. Personally, I see the need for one to be discerning. It is helpful to I consider the following questions before responding. Is the advice or desire given morally right? Is it encouraging for me to act against positive principles in my life? Is it given based on prejudices or as a means to fulfill the person's own unattainable aspirations? Such questions only apply when "grey situations" occur that throw young people like me into dilemmas. I am convinced that one should not simply obey without thinking. Our blind obedience to the seniors in our lives only confirms how immature, impulsive and naive we are. Should it be wrong advice, we should still maintain our cool and disagree in a tactful and dis rebellious way. We must think before we act upon an advice given!

Thus, I do believe that young people should always respect people older than themselves at all times considering their seniority, and as a means to express our politeness and love for them. However, to obey them at all times is questionable and it depends on the Tightness and basis of the command or advice given. It certainly takes a mature youth to discern correctly what is right and wrong and to respond wisely.

Grandparents


Many of us are fortunate to have grandparents close by at the time that we are born. In fact when our mothers become pregnant to bear us, no doubt they must have turned to their parents, our grandparents, for advice and assistance. This is probably because our parents were young .and needed someone to hold their hands; someone who had been there before. Undoubtedly, most of our parents would have depended on their parents at that crucial time. Following this, during our childhood too, our grandparents would have been there at the side of our parents to help bring us up when we were infants. Needless to say, we owe much to our grandparents.

The attitude of helping to look after ones grandchildren is only present in members of the human race. No other known animal on the planet seems to have this particular trend. Strangely also, the tradition of grandparents playing an important role in the birth and upbringing of grandchildren seems to be a universal trend among humans. Just like the fact that the best arrangement for couples in the human race is to be together for life, subject to divorce not taking place, grandparents too must be an outcome of evolution. It is probable also that through the five million years of mans existence on this planet; we have found that having grandparents around is the best thing. The origins of tradition are lost in oblivion, but we may be sure that they are founded upon what is practical; usually after several experiments. In this way, the idea of grandparents remaining close to us has been found to be a blessing.

All of us know that grandparents are symbols of wisdom; they speak from experience and tell us how to go where they have been. They may not be up to date in matter of science and other branches of knowledge, but they would have been though the 'school of hard knocks'. They are usually experts at relationships. Many of us have learn at their knees that have saved us pain in later life. It is grandparents who tell us that though money and other symbols of wealth are nice to have, the real values in life are the non-material kind. They themselves have probably discovered this through a lifetime of pain and sorrow. We often see them trying to make up to their children - our parents - for their having been strict, perhaps even unkind, to them when they were young. As it often turns out, they often try to parent us to try to make up for the mistakes they made in parenting their own children. Being thus close to them, many of us who listen to them are saved the pain of making the- same painful mistakes.

It is unfortunate that, as part of the modern lifestyle, we are losing contact with our grandparents. It is just not wise at all, but it is happening all around us, that after five million years of evolution, we are now discarding some of the more beautiful aspects of being a human. Pushing grandparents out of the scene is out of them. Many of them are being exiled in old folk's homes; where being deprived of something useful to do and of being loved and wanted, they waste away to early ends. One can only hope that the trend will be reversed; if not for the sake of our grandparents - for the sake of the wisdom they have to offer all of us.

When a new committee is elected for an organization, a wise organization ensures that either the chairperson or the secretary of the retiring committee sits on the new committee. The reason for this is obvious: there needs to be continuity. When the new committee runs against a snag, the members from the old committee will usually be happy to share their experience. The case is similar with grandparents. They-ensure that there is continuity in the family. They, are the links to the past. They remember when life was simpler and can belt out advice based on experience rather than theory. Whereas, knowledge on all sorts of technology is available from books and consultants, such simple things like when to rush a woman to hospital for delivery is known only through experience. Grandparents are adept at this type of knowledge.

Grandparents Activities

Grandparents are the guardians of wisdom. What they are able to share with the younger generation – such as their grandchildren - is the wisdom of having been there and having done that and gained from it. In my own experience it was my grandfather who taught me that there was more to life than watching TV I learned that reading is a fascinating pastime from my grandfather. My father hardly reads at all. Also from my grandfather I learned to enjoy the classics. I also learned to love nature because the old man had the time and the patience to take me on long hikes and show me that trees were not just trees. If not for anything else, in Singapore at least, grandparents often act as parent replacements. Most of our parents are usually too busy earning a living to do anything else for us. Lucky indeed are individuals who grow up with at least one set of grandparents.

Though I have often seen my parents treating my grandparents as if they were children to be taken care of, I have often seen my parents - especially in moments if stress - depending on them. The time my sister gave birth to her first offspring comes to mind. My sister was in pain; my mother panicked and called my grandmother - not the doctor. My father just clasped his hands and prayed. My grandparents arrived within minutes. I could see the relief on my parents' faces. Immediately the old timers took over. My grandfather reassured my father that all would be well. My grandmother put her arms around my mother to assure her that she was there. Then she went to my sister and took her by the hand. Straightaway, my sister seems to sense that all would be well. My grandmother began to time the abdominal convulsions. "The baby will born by morning," she announced. Then my brother-in-law started his car. At the hospital waiting room, though we were all there, it was on my grandparents that everyone depended. Somehow we all felt that since they were there, all would be well. As predicted, my niece was born at 3:00 a.m. My grandmother smiled smugly and hugged everyone.

In any organized society, it is the older people who are in charge. The younger and more energetic ones may be the ones who get things done, but the elders hold the reins of power. This is true in so-called ‘primitive’ societies as well as in powerful countries with organized government. Many world leaders are grandparents or at least people who are older. This is an indication that wisdom - not knowledge alone - is required for effective leadership.

Discipline


 Discipline



Discipline is based on pride, on meticulous attention to details, and on mutual respect and confidence. Discipline must be a habit so ingrained that it is stronger than the excitement of the goal or the fear of failure" said by Gray Ryan Blair. 

Behind every great achievement in anyone's life lies discipline. We see this in every human endeavor. In the field of sports we see this repeated again and again. Outstanding sportsmen spend all their time practicing. In the process many of them make so many sacrifices which ordinary men and women are not willing to make. The same is true of businessmen who build up fortunes. Most often we see only that they achieve, but once we go behind the scenes we see that they have put in a lot of discipline. We all have read of great musicians, writers and inventors who have credited or discovered breakthroughs in human achievement. Invariably they have said that they owe all their success to discipline.

Teaching Discipline
Discipline is the art, where having determined where we want to go or what we want to create or discover, we stick to our goals whatever the disadvantages until we achieve the goal. Though there are other meanings of the word, this is what concerns us most. We find many applications for discipline in our daily lives; ranging from doing our homework to building up our physical fitness to make sure we join the soccer squad. If we look carefully at the periods of failure in our lives, we will see that in almost every occasion when we failed, it was due to lack of discipline. Hence both in the areas of success through discipline and the lack of success through the lack of discipline, there are many examples for us to refer to. 

Since a life lived with discipline can offer us much, it is worthwhile discussing how it is to be done. First we have to be sure of what we want to achieve and how much we want to achieve it. If one is obsessed with wanting to succeed in a certain area, the chances of attaining that want is so much more. To do this, one has to dwell on the want through visualizing it happening. The second step is determining what has to be done to attain that want. This will come to mind naturally if one's want is a sincere and serious one. Hence if a man wants to join the national soccer squad, he must really want to and if he does, he would know what he has to do to get there. The same procedure applies if one wants to write a book, or own a successful business or top the school in English literature. The final step is the discipline to do and keep doing what must be done until the results appear. 
  
There are countless examples to show how people achieve success in this way. One example is the sage of Colonel Saunders. The 65-year-old man from Kentucky had a dream to start a chain on fried chicken restaurants all over the world. To realize that dream, he knew that he needed a restaurant owner to go into partnership with him to open the first restaurant and to fry chicken according to the secret recipe the old man had. Colonel Sanders knocked on 1008 doors before he found a restaurant owner willing to share his dream. It is doubtful if many of us would have had the discipline to knock even a hundred doors. The old man from Kentucky is just one example. There are thousands of such which show that success can come to anyone through the application of discipline.